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square vs. round, ..why try so hard to be someone else?
Southern Belle
post Wed Jun 2, 2004, 08:14 PM
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thinking about the discussion that izzy girl started...

I was thinking after trying so hard to act "deaf" I realized that I was not happy. It dawned on me that I no longer need to apologize for not signing "pure ASL" or whatever that means.

Someone once said it is like trying to be "a square peg" when you are round.

Another person said something about apples and pears. If you are an "apple", then why try so hard to be a pear and change yourself to be a pear when you could be happy as an apple?

when you know who you are, it makes life much easier.

s'belle
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Patty
post Wed Jun 2, 2004, 08:40 PM
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Girly, you are who you are. If no one can accept you for who you are, they can kiss your sweet @$$!! Be happy with who you are whether that is d/Deaf, HoH and or late-deafened. (IMG:http://www.deafonline2.com/forums/style_emoticons/default/wink.gif)
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Sherry
post Thu Jun 3, 2004, 04:50 AM
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No ALIAS until January 2005!!! EEK!
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S'Belle.... I have no idea how one "acts deaf" or how one "acts hearing". I talk the way I talk, I sign the way I sign, I burp, hiccup and sneeze the way I do...who is to tell me it is wrong?

I think those who tell you it is wrong generally have something wrong themselves.

March on.

Sherry
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Southern Belle
post Thu Jun 3, 2004, 06:44 AM
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QUOTE (Patty @ Jun 2 2004, 08:40 PM)
Girly, you are who you are. If no one can accept you for who you are, they can kiss your sweet @$$!! Be happy with who you are whether that is d/Deaf, HoH and or late-deafened.  (IMG:http://www.deafonline2.com/forums/style_emoticons/default/wink.gif)

patty,

thanks!

s'belle
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Southern Belle
post Thu Jun 3, 2004, 06:57 AM
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QUOTE (Sherry @ Jun 3 2004, 04:50 AM)
S'Belle.... I have no idea how one "acts deaf" or how one "acts hearing".  I talk the way I talk, I sign the way I sign, I burp, hiccup and sneeze the way I do...who is to tell me it is wrong?

I think those who tell you it is wrong generally have something wrong themselves.

March on.

Sherry

sherry,

thanks! it took me a while to figure that I cannot please everyone. It's important to know who I am. Now I am happy with the way I am.

I agree with you that when someone tells me I am wrong, then there is something wrong with them.

For example, a certain interpreter (very unusual experience for me) who tried to herd me into the Deaf community and sign more ASL. It turns out he is from a macho background and he looks very macho but he is gay. he struggled with that. I can kind of understand him, but he is not someone I would want to invite over for tea. I can be polite to him for a few minutes but that is it!

s'belle
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Lantana
post Thu Jun 3, 2004, 12:44 PM
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Hmm, off topic a little bit -- but I wanted to say that some of my best friends are gay men. They treat me like a lady, tell me when I look nice, and want no favors except my companionship. My computer guru is gay and I have learned so much from him. Okay, we can go back on topic now, sorry!
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sweetnanna
post Thu Jun 3, 2004, 05:12 PM
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A very good topic, S'Belle: I like Patty's and Sherry's quotes! Also, I want to do the best I know how and do what makes me comfortable...after all, we have one life to live on this earth and we should be able to do the best we can. Accept who you are and a smooth sailing will come.
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Sherry
post Thu Jun 3, 2004, 05:27 PM
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No ALIAS until January 2005!!! EEK!
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I had two gay "friends" in Colorado. One of them drove me nuts cuz he was such a character. He smelled like garlic all the time, he thought AIDS was transmitted by water (he was deaf) and he would embarrassed me when I had to do stuff with him at lunch for work. He worked with the SSDI folks so I had no choice. He would tell ME I was too "dressed up" for work and I'd tell him to complain to my boss then. He'd just smile. (IMG:http://www.deafonline2.com/forums/style_emoticons/default/wink.gif) The other gay friend was hearing and he always fixed things for me around my place- He used to tell me to get a sex change as a joke so he would be attracted to me. (IMG:http://www.deafonline2.com/forums/style_emoticons/default/blink.gif) I'd just laugh at him and give him a beer.

Thing is, you can't let others make you feel bad or you'll always feel bad! So pffft. Just be comfortable and happy and eat chocolate!
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Southern Belle
post Thu Jun 3, 2004, 07:21 PM
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lantana,

how nice to be treated so well!

sweetnanna,

thanks! I agree with you about the quotes! it is a nice feeling being yourself when you know who you are! it took me a while to figure that out, though!

sherry,

thanks for a good chuckle! I have quite a number of gay friends and they are wonderful to me! I was reminded of a friend's quote. She once said the perfect man is gay. I knew what she meant!

thanks everyone!
s'belle
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LittlePitty
post Thu Jun 3, 2004, 07:32 PM
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oh yes...the perfect men are ALWAYS gay...Murphy's Law (IMG:http://www.deafonline2.com/forums/style_emoticons/default/tongue.gif)

People who try to be someone they are not just are not happy with who they are!
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Southern Belle
post Thu Jun 3, 2004, 07:39 PM
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everyone,

if you want to continue discussing gay friends or perfect men or whatever, I started a new topic.

back to topic,

just cannot believe it took me this long to figure out WHO I am and that there is no reason to apologize for who I am. I am a lot happier now because now I know who I am, that I have many good qualities, etc.

so, thanks everyone for cheering me on!

s'belle
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